Dreaming in Music…

Do you ever wake up dreaming music?

Maybe you’re just hearing it in your dreams, as a soundtrack, and then that song that is playing in your head when you wake up remains with you throughout the day, along with the feelings associated with it. This morning I woke up hearing The Old Castle from Mussorgsky’s ‘Picture’s at an Exhibition’. Here’s a link to the Tishmalov version, if you’d like to give it a listen. It’s beautiful and rich and haunting. Take the time to close your eyes and allow a story to unfold. That’s the best way (IMHO) to experience music, especially orchestral music.

Last week there was a day I woke up with ‘Soon It’s Gonna Rain’, from the Fantasticks!     I love that show! It’s my favorite musical, and so much fun to play. The orchestration is just a harp and a piano. If you’ve never seen the Fantasticks, here’s a link. Oh, and that is not me playing the harp, it’s just a random video I found on Youtube.

I’m a big fan of dreams, a vivid dreamer, a dream journaler, and so many of my dreams have been portents of things to come. I often write my dreams down, but the really vivid ones stick with me for years, their  impact resonating in my life. My first musical dreams, and the first dreams I remember, took place when I was 3 or 4. I dreamed I was a Fairie, with beautiful butterfly wings, playing a harp and singing.  It has been and is a recurrent dream, and for those who know me, it is proof that dreams can & do come true, in ways we can never imagine! During early childhood, while all the other girls were pretending they were princesses, I was pretending to be the Magic Singing Harp from Jack in the Beanstock. All of my life I knew I would eventually play the Harp,  and when the opportunity came at the age of 19, I gave it my all. Now I AM the Magic Singing Harp. I AM a Fairie, and music gives me beautiful butterfly wings. The dreams we manifest can point the way to our Heart’s desires, and help us to manifest the lives we dream of.

I often dream that I’m playing music, usually on the Harp, occasionally on the Piano (which I also play), and sometimes on instruments that I still don’t know how to play, like the Kora, a West African Lyre/Harp.

or the Guzheng, a Chinese Zither, which is a cousin to the Harp. I’m hoping to buy one of them sometime soon 🙂

or the Qanun/Kanoon, a Turkish Zither.

Thirty years ago I wrote a letter to Jalaleddin Takesh, a famous Kanoon player, introducing myself as a professional Harpist and telling him of my interest in that instrument. I asked him where I could procure a good quality Kanoon, and written instructions on how to tune & play it. He actually took the time to send a reply, informing me that as a woman, I lacked the complex thinking required to play such an instrument, and some other demeaning BS. At the time I owned all of his recordings, which were wonderful. I broke them all. There are plenty of other gifted musicians in the world, who don’t view women as incompetent or less than. I listen to them instead. And as you can see, the person playing the Kanoon in the video above is a woman.

I also have dreams where I’m composing music. That can be a little crazy, as I wake  up groping for the light switch, my journal, and a pen to jot down notes, lyrics, rhythmic patterns, etc. A few years ago I dreamed it was snowing, and I heard the opening to Pachelbel’s Canon in D, and then superimposed over that was ‘In the Bleak Midwinter’, by Gustav Holst. I woke up, quickly went downstairs, sat down at my harp with my practice journal (I have journals for everything), and started testing it out, and with a few harmonic tweakings, it worked! That dream became the inspiration and the title cut for my xmasy CD, MidWinter’s Canon.

Years ago I wrote a song called ‘Journey to Serenity’, which is on my Cynical Serenity CD. The lyrics were written while I was on a plane, flying from St. Louis to visit my folks in Florida. The music didn’t come to me right away, however, which can be frustrating for songwriters, and I do have a drawer full of song lyrics that I’ve never set to music…yet… Anyway, I’ve learned that you can’t force it, so I just let it go for awhile, contemplating the lyrics, tinkering with some ideas on the Harp, but otherwise believing that it would happen in it’s time. Lo and behold, a few weeks later I dreamed that I was in a plane, and it was kind of like a crazy music video, where sometimes I was playing and singing and sometimes I was sitting in my seat looking down from the sky. In the early morning hours I ended up down in my studio, playing my harp and singing softly, and jotting things down, and by the time the sun rose, the song was complete.

If you’d like to see and hear it, here’s a video.

 

About year ago, I woke up with Tom Petty’s song, ‘I Won’t Back Down’ stuck in my head. It’s probably my least favorite Tom Petty song of all time, and it haunted me for a couple of weeks. I thought I’d never get that song out of my head!

Do you dream in music? If so, what kinds of music do you tend to dream?

My Post-Election Pre-Apocolyptic Breakfast – The REALLY best Paleo almost Aip Plantain Pancakes!

First off, I can’t believe it’s been over 3 months since I’ve posted!

I’ve started several posts during that time, all with good intentions. I’ve taken several photo of my garden, food, and all the other awesome things in my life. But I’ve just been way to busy to spend any real time at my computer, sorting things out into some kind of coherent blog post.

What was I doing?

Playing gigs! During the period between October 16th and Dec 4th I played with 7 different orchestras, yes, Seven different orchestras, with 7 different concert programs, in 8 weeks! So I was practicing A LOT  in between my usual schedule of private students (Harp & Piano). Meanwhile I was also playing a variety of other gigs during that time, like weddings, funerals, etc. And when I was done with all of that, the HoliDaze gigs started, but now all I have left is 2 Christmas Eve church services, and then a blessed week off between Christmas and New Year’s Day. No gigs. No students. Just a week to sleep, rest, eat good food, and goof off a little bit. And get ready for the New Year!

Anyway, it’s all good, and next week I’m going to try to end the year by sharing a mini-compilation of some of the posts I almost posted over the last couple of months, just so that those photo’s and semi-blog-blurbs won’t go to waste!

Meanwhile, here is the Post I had planned to post a few days after the election, written on November 9th.

My Post Election Pre-Apocolyptic Breakfast

On Election Day (yesterday) my sons & I got up early, so that we could be at the poll when it opened to exercise our right & responsibility to vote, and then go out to breakfast. It’s our tradition. Afterwards, we came home and I spent the entire day cleaning my sunroom, and bringing in the houseplants that have lived outside for the last several months. I love sitting in my sunroom, sipping tea, eating breakfast, and communing with my dwarf citrus trees all winter!

I didn’t spend the day thinking about the election, although I did check online before I went to bed, and it was clear to me by 9pm that Trump was going to be the winner, admittedly not the outcome I was hoping for, but I slept well anyway.

Now that the election is over, I’m grateful for the following things:

1. The end, at least for a few years, of all the political bullshit: phone calls, advertisements, junk mail, etc. What a waste of time, resources, and materials.
2. I’m also grateful that I live in the USA, where everyone is allowed to vote, and if I don’t like the outcome, in 4 years I can try again.
3. My wonderful creative life, which I will continue to enjoy with wild abandon. I will continue to play my harp, garden, sing, make good food, meditate, encourage & nurture my inner child, be kind, and savor the many awesome moments that life offers, 24 – 7.

As an American, I am disgusted/dismayed by the following things:

1. The hatefulness & slanderous comments that are allowed to proliferate in the media, especially during election years. It’s nothing new. The candidates spend most of their time telling us how awful their opponent is, & implying negative things about their honesty, integrity, and intentions. They tell us very little about themselves. There is a saying that applies here: “When you point a finger at somebody else, you’re pointing 3 back at yourself.” I wish the candidates would all agree to this suggestion: If you can’t say something nice, please don’t say anything at all. Quit talking about your opponent, and tell me about yourself. I also wish that the media would agree to not allow vaguely slanderous comments & outright lies to be broadcasted, published, etc.
2. The ignorance of my fellow Americans, and the Dumbing Down of the American People. There are a lot of Americans who are poorly educated & poorly informed. Add to this the addiction to Reality TV, which in my opinion generally promotes rude behavior and overall stupidity. Many people will believe anything they see on TV, and even more so if they see it on the internet. Any blogger can post something hateful & blatantly slanderous/untrue, and I guarantee there are people who will believe it & share it as a fact.
3. People who don’t vote, but want to complain about the government & the election results, and then blather on in an uninformed way about these things. Shut the F@#k up, please!
4. The Doomsday Drama Queens (both male & female), who proliferate on social media. Just because your candidate didn’t win, that doesn’t mean the world is going to end, or our country is going to collapse, or one of the other super powers is going to starting lobbing missiles our way.
5. The Crazy Racists, Masogynists, and other Wacko’s that seem to proliferate in the USA these days.

I personally avoid Drama in my life. Fear of the Future will keep me from enjoying today. Talking about and imagining horrible scenarios where women lose all their rights, where we return to some kind of dark ages, & where Hitler-esque atrocities take place is not conducive to savoring life. When we imagine fearful, painful, miserable things, we feel those emotions each time. We become emotionally invested in them. We mind-F&@k ourselves into an endless cycle of emotions & mental realities that will probably never actually materialize in real life. Whether we’re talking about Election results, or just in everyday life, it’s a self-destructive practice that I let go of over 30 years ago, and for that I am endlessly grateful.

I’m not talking about going into denial & sticking my head in the sand like an ostrich. I’m talking about living my life as if nothing has changed, until something actually changes. In that event, I’ll feel what I feel in that moment, do whatever it is I need to do, and continue on. It’s called Living.

We have a new President Elect (he won’t actually be the President until January).

As we say in recovery, Acceptance is the Key.

I don’t know where the next 4 years will lead us. Nobody really knows. But I do know that the President is only one person, that there are limits to that person’s power, and just because he says he’s going to do certain things, that doesn’t mean the American people will allow it. We are a country that prizes personal freedom, and our constitution guarantees that.

Where do we go from here? Forward! Starting with a Decadent Breakfast, because every day in my house starts with food.

My Post-Election Pre-Apocolyse Breakfast was Plantain pancakes, bacon, eggs topped with crispy shallots on a bed of greens, and peach preserves (one of my rare cheats, although they are fruit juice sweetened at least), with plenty of black tea!

“Why so many cups of tea, AND a pot of tea too?” you inquire…

Because I love tea! And I want to linger over my breakfast, without having to get up and make more.

My hopes for the USA & all of it’s inhabitants: Let’s all be kind to one another. Let’s all be Creative and express ourselves in a loving way, accepting & celebrating our differences, encouraging each other to learn & grow. And don’t forget to have a good breakfast!

The REALLY best Paleo/almost AIP Plantain Pancakes Recipe!

I’ve been playing around with this recipe for awhile, and I have to say, I’m really satisfied with the taste and the texture! Most of the plantain pancake recipes I’ve tried have been really gummy, and also a disaster to flip. These are almost like ‘real’ pancakes!

1 Plantain – If you want a sweeter pancake, go with a riper plantain. If you want more savory, go with green. Slice it up into several pieces & remove the peel. You can also use bananas, but you’ll probably need 1.5 – 2 bananas to equal one plantain.

2 eggs

1 tsp vanilla

2 Tb melted coconut oil

a pinch of salt

1/4 tsp baking soda

1 Tb Coconut Flour

2 Tb Arrowroot Flour

Opt: Cinnamon, Powdered Ginger, or other flavors you like (pumpkin pie spice?)

Put all of the ingredients into your food processor & let it go, stopping to scrape the edges a few times, just to make sure everything gets blended up well. Meanwhile, heat up a griddle or skillet to medium-ish. I love my cast iron griddle! And BTW, if you’re using cast iron cookware (and if you’re not, you really should be!), you need a silicone basting brush! It’s the best way to oil your skillets and such, and it also doubles as a fun inner child painting activity! You can baste it with coconut oil, lard, bacon fat, or whatever fat you choose. Also, if something sticks, just work that basting brush under the edges and it will usually let go like magic!

Once the griddle is hot, start making pancakes! I like to use a small ladle, I think the one in the pic holds about 1/8 of a cup, or maybe 1/4th. I keep the pancakes smallish, so that they are easier to turn. Let them bubble, but keep an eye them because they do have a tendency to burn rather easily. They might not bubble that much, and if you need to flip them more than once, it’s ok. Just do it. They will have a tender texture when they first come off the griddle, but will firm up a little more as they cool.

Once the pancakes are done, fry  up some bacon on the same surface, and eggs if you like, and enjoy! You can serve them with preserves or jam, real maple syrup, fresh fruit, coconut whipped cream, or whatever you like, short stack or tall. To be honest, I usually stand there grazing on them as they come off the griddle, plain.

If you’re following an AIP variation, you can eat these as long as you can eat eggs. If you can’t eat eggs, I’m sorry…

This recipe makes roughly a dozen pancakes and here’s the nutritional breakdown per cake: 65 calories, 8 Grams of Carbs, 4 Grams of Fat, 1 Gram of Protein. That’s 44% carbs, 48% Fat, and 8% Protein. So as you can see, they aren’t exactly low carb, LOL. But they are delicious. And worthy as a breakfast treat. And if you look at the overall meal in the picture, with the bacon, eggs, greens & preserves,  it comes out like this:

 

Yes, it’s kind of a big breakfast, but I also tend to eat late in the morning, and then I don’t eat lunch, so if I eat a high protein low carb dinner, it all balances out nicely. And I’m not really sticking to a Keto kind of thing right now anyway, at least not every day!

And I don’t eat them every day! If I’ve had a particularly intense workout, or if I just feel like pampering myself a little bit, they really do the trick.

 

I recommend that you triple the recipe. A single batch will blend up well, but a triple batch seems to blend up better. Eat as many as you want, then freeze the leftovers on a cookie sheet and bag them for days when you want an easy breakfast, a quick snack, a bacon & eggs sandwich, or just because you feel like having pancakes and therefore you should have them. Enjoy!

 

The Wonderful Burden of Being Me: Creating Order amidst the Chaos…

I have, in some ways, a storybook life, where I mostly get to do whatever I want all day. I play my Harps & keyboards, sing, compose, workout, garden, make & eat awesome food, write, etc. It’s all wonderful, and although I don’t always have a lot of money, I manage to make ends meet and I am immensely grateful for all that I have, all that I am, and all that I am yet to be. My life is awesome.

Then there is little terri. little terri is my inner child. She looks innocent enough, but in reality she’s a crazy 4 year old, who wants what she wants and wants it right now. She’s compulsive and unwilling to listen to reason.     She’s smart, precocious, and prone to Obsessions, with her current obsession being “The Wheel of Time”, a series of high fantasy books by Robert Jordan, 15 books in all!  We, and by We, I’m referring to the Me, Myself, and I known as Terri HarpLady, little terri, and Ms. Theresa (my personal inner Secretary/Office Manager/Parent), started reading the books back in July and are currently on book 8, The Path of Daggers. It’s a wonderful series, and we can’t put it down! This means I’m not sleeping enough, or doing many of the things I need to do to keep my life flowing in a manageable way, and luckily, I don’t really have a lot going on right now, or I’d be in trouble!

Here’s another view of little terri, drawn by my Tea Sister Sil

little terri is somewhat unruly, but she is also filled with joy, wonder, playfulness, & adventure. She likes to lock Ms. Theresa in a closet somewhere in the recesses of my mind, because Ms. T is kind of bossy, and not really very much fun. Ms. T likes to organize things & create systems, dreams of creating a beautiful orderly life for us, and when she finally picked the lock and broke out of the closet, she took one look around and screamed! Here’s what our office looks like, or at least half of it.

This panoramic view is primarily focused on our desk, which is where much of the mess lies. Granted, even when things are neater, it’s really a mix of chaos & order. We have a special system, designed especially for us, by Ms. Theresa, which includes elements of various other systems. Years ago Ms Theresa read a book, “The Sidetracked Home Executives: From Pigpen to Paradise” by Pam Brace & Peggy Jones. That book formed the cornerstone of her ongoing attempts to create order in Our lives, and her efforts continue to this day, pulling elements from “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” by Stephen R. Covey,   “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up” by Marie Kondo, “The Passion Planner” by Angelia Trinidad (The best calendar ever, and yes, you need one!), and even the 12 Steps of NA.

Here is the card file, the same one I purchased back in 1983, as recommended by Pam & Peggy (known by some as the “Slob Sisters”). It’s filled with a variety of daily, weekly, monthly, seasonal, and yearly tasks, each written on 3X5 cards.  Each day has it’s tasks, and when I actually complete each card, most of which take very little time to do, then I’ve accomplished something! Clearing off my Desk, for example, is a weekly task, meant to be done on Tuesdays, but today is Wednesday, and as you can see, I didn’t do all the Tuesday jobs yesterday. Not because they were difficult, but because I did other things, including playing a gig, teaching a few students, and then spent the rest of the day reading. Luckily, this system is kind of flexible. Although for me, that can also be it’s downfall, LOL.

Thanks to this card system, I’ve realized that I work best in cycles, and although I’m chronically right brained, my alter ego Ms. Theresa, has developed certain left brain tendencies that have helped expand upon this system. Each day of the week has a special quality to it, that instills a sense of order into my meandering life, and helps me to focus on the tasks at hand.

Maintenance Mondays consist of a few hours of concentrated housework, with all members of the house participating. The kitchen always gets cleaned, and especially on the first Monday of the month, which focuses on the first floor, with the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th mondays being dedicated to the 2nd floor, basement, and front yard. The 5th Mondays are for special projects, like the garage. Monday is also my cookup day, where I make some staples to enjoy for the rest of the week, and plan some meals. It’s all about doing those things that will help the rest of the week flow smoothly.

Techno Tuesdays are dedicated to my desk work: clean my desk, balance checkbooks, pay bills, and other ‘businessy’ kind of things. I have plans to designate each Tuesday of the month to a specific task as well, such as updating my website on the first tuesday, etc.

Writer Wednesdays – In theory, Wednesday is the day for writing my Blog, which I’m finally doing today. I’m also a songwriter, and I have a few NaNoWriMo novels that I hope to eventually move from First Draft to something more, and a few other unfinished projects.  Of course, there will also be a rotating Wednesday monthly schedule, and a part of Wednesdays is Wandering Wednesdays, my weekly errand excursion, which usually happens in the morning. Sometimes, especially in the Spring, it becomes Wild Wednesday, a full day of gardening.

Tidy up Thurs, which fits because it’s my laundry day, also rotating through personal monthly tasks, like vacuuming my bedroom, changing my sheets, straightening up my studio, etc. It is also Tie it Up Thursday, meaning finish any projects that were started earlier in the week, so I can end the week with a feeling of completion. I also get to plan my creative ideas for Friday.

Freedom Friday! Yes, Fridays are dedicated to music & creativity! Recording myself, learning how to use Logic better, playing my Harp with wild abandon. Of course, I play music most days for an hour or 2, working on orchestra parts, or special pieces for an upcoming gig or another, but Friday is for being original and just having fun.

When I don’t have gigs on the weekends, we’re talking Slackerly Saturday and/or Slackerly Sunday. Sleep in, have a late breakfast, take a hot bubble bath, and do whatever I want, which usually includes wearing PJs all day.

This is the basis for my system, although there are many other elements. Each day I try to get through all the dailies, like practicing, working out, gardening. Then I move on to the weeklies, monthlies, etc. I also have students on and off, gigs here & there, and a variety of projects I’m juggling (way too many, to be honest).

From Chaos to Creativity…more or less!